May 232013

From the minds of five ordinary nerds comes a tour-de-force of bad fan fiction, a derivative work so puerile, so debauched, so nonsensical that we devoted an entire episode to exploring its murky depths. Each member of the Rag-NERD-rok Crew comes to the table with a different intellectual property in the hopes of creating a five-way crossover fic that will leave you stunned–preferably in a good way, but we’ll take whatever stunned reactions we can get. The result is part fanfic, part role play, part improvised musical, and completely, hilariously terrible from beginning to end. Join us for a ret-conning, fourth-wall-shattering, Gary-Stu-creating extravaganza of an episode, this month on Rag-NERD-rok!

(Show notes after the break.)

I. Cold Open: Rag-NERD-rok in the Hood (00:00:00)

After seeing this comment from listener John Henry, we were all excited to take advantage of our newfound access to “the hood.”

We shouldn’t say any more though, because there’s a line of bad taste there somewhere, and we sure as hell don’t want to be caught on the wrong side of it.

II. The Worst Fanfic Ever (00:00:28)

When Twilight Sparkle screws up a spell in the world of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, she inadvertently causes a portal storm that drags characters from a number of disparate sources into a hideous train wreck of a crossover. The Zoobles from Zobilee Zoo, Sam and Al from Quantum Leap, Inspector Javert from Les Miserables, and badass engineer Isaac Clarke from Dead Space are all displaced from their home dimensions in the ensuing chaos, and the necromorphs from the ISS Ishimura are close behind. This massively diverse cast will have to work together if they want to survive the final confrontation at the Parisian barricade, especially after The Great and Powerful Trixie, Bravo Fox, and Monsieur Thénardier conspire with the Necromorph King to kill Twilight Sparkle and steal all the money in Zoobilee Zoo. Can our heroes beat back the necromorphs and win the day? Will Javert and Jean Valjean find true love? And what tragic fate will befall everyone’s favorite new Zooble, Teddy the Tortoise?

Listen to find out!

III. Outro (01:19:25)

We hope you’ve (enjoyed? tolerated?) our terrible fan fiction! If you would like to suggest a title or share your opinion on the story with us, feel free to email us or leave us a voicemail at (516) 362 – NERD [6373]. You can also get in touch with us by Liking us on Facebook or following us on Twitter. If you subscribe to podcasts through iTunes, be sure to check us out there and leave us a review!

Music / SFX:

Outro: Requiem for a Fish (The Freak Fandango Orchestra) / CC BY-SA 3.0
Sound effects courtesy of NoiseCollector of


Creative Commons License
Rag-NERD-rok Podcast by Alex Costello, Edward Cress, Erik Dickash, Ryan Mannix and Billy Meyer is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License.
Permissions beyond the scope of this license may be available by contacting’

All other properties mentioned in this episode belong to their respective copyright holders and were used without permission for the purposes of parody. Please don’t sue us.

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