In a world where advanced age unlocks a latent connection to the supernatural, several elderly residents of a small town retirement community band together to form The Shady Pines Amateur Monster Slayers. For Jared Applebaum, slaying is a way to avenge his dead wife, who was killed by demons while working out in their orchards. Warwick Van Hoyt, a little person criminal mastermind who also goes by his street name “El Gordo,” always had a connection to the otherworldly, but abandoned his fae partner in crime in order to escape justice. Malkael, an angel sent by some higher power, poses as innocent human Jane Smith while she plays guardian to Warwick. Drew MacDougal received his first tome of magic by mail at age 55, when the scryers at the AARP detected his budding potential as a wizard. Finally, Greg is some werewolf dude who showed up one day with no memory of his past. When a group of college students goes missing after an unexplained boating accident, the S*P*A*M*S investigate, uncovering the plot of a folkloric nasty that may go deeper and have farther reaching consequences than they imagine. Can they stop the kelpie before it claims another victim?
Here it is, the Dungeon World game everyone’s been clamoring for: the grand finale of The Nettle Crusades! With the fate of the universe at stake, The Nettlers (and Taeros) press on to the Realms of Corruption, where the Onion of Death awaits. However, when they stop to explore the fortress that lies on the border between realms, Taeros unwittingly frees a god of destruction from his eternal imprisonment, and now the fallen deity seeks to feed the universe to some kind of devourer. With the gods of light arrayed against them and the gods of darkness waiting to see who comes out on top, will our seriously overpowered adventurers be able to save the entire universe?
The Nettlers (and Taeros) continue their final quest to save the world from rampaging deities in the divine realms! On their way to retrieve the Onion of Life from its hiding place, they decide to stop at Techomsah’s stronghold, where Barnabus makes a startling discovery about the nature of his patron deity. Meanwhile, Pendrell takes on the divine mantle of a god who wants to escape the impending destruction of the universe, but finds that he is ill-suited to managing the god’s intended domain. As the party approaches the Shrine of Life, wherein their prize awaits, Barnabus, Pendrell and Avon are transported to a secret dungeon buried far beneath the ground, where a dark god of suffering has also been imprisoned. Can they find their way out of a magical trap, acquire the Onion of Life and continue on their journey, or are they doomed to spend eternity at the mercy of an evil deity?
Legend tells of a hidden tomb that is only revealed when The Empty Star rises to its zenith in the heavens, the final resting place of a long-buried wizard king whose treasures await those brave or foolish enough to enter. A group of Level 0 peasants, armed only with their wits and the implements of their respective trades, gathers outside the tomb’s magical entrance, prepared to risk all to acquire the riches locked inside. Before they can count their gold, however, they’ll have to overcome the tomb’s considerable defenses, and confront the terrors that lie within.
NOTE: Due to time constraints and irregular attendance, we never completed this adventure. If scenarios lacking resolution are the sort of thing that bothers you, feel free to skip this episode. If you do, however, you should know that you’re missing out on a lot of gonzo dungeon crawl fun!