In a world where advanced age unlocks a latent connection to the supernatural, several elderly residents of a small town retirement community band together to form The Shady Pines Amateur Monster Slayers. For Jared Applebaum, slaying is a way to avenge his dead wife, who was killed by demons while working out in their orchards. Warwick Van Hoyt, a little person criminal mastermind who also goes by his street name “El Gordo,” always had a connection to the otherworldly, but abandoned his fae partner in crime in order to escape justice. Malkael, an angel sent by some higher power, poses as innocent human Jane Smith while she plays guardian to Warwick. Drew MacDougal received his first tome of magic by mail at age 55, when the scryers at the AARP detected his budding potential as a wizard. Finally, Greg is some werewolf dude who showed up one day with no memory of his past. When a group of college students goes missing after an unexplained boating accident, the S*P*A*M*S investigate, uncovering the plot of a folkloric nasty that may go deeper and have farther reaching consequences than they imagine. Can they stop the kelpie before it claims another victim?