Apr 262017
 
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After being tricked by an evil Master and teleported halfway across the realm, our intrepid Archaeonauts find themselves in a vast forest, surrounded¬†by hostile gorilla people. Once captured, they meet with two fellow prisoners, an undead gentleman underwear thief and a tubular shark-person shaman. When their captors’ queen learns of their situation, she dispatches the team, newcomers in tow, to retrieve the fragments of a long-forgotten artifact that could help them defeat their enemy once and for all. Can the Archaeonauts battle their way through a sacred tomb in order to obtain the artifact? Will the queen discover that her royal panties have been pilfered by a dapper zombie? Is it better to be nourished forever with a vine growing into¬†every bodily orifice, or suffer in the nether realms in eternal agony? Find out, in this week’s episode of Masters of Umdaar!

Apr 192017
 
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Following their adventure in the skylands, Ruby Gleam (Spell-Weaver Supreme), Dourla the Loveslug, Ryder the Last Battle Toad, Charlemagne the (newly) octopoid cytyr, and Sir Reginald meet a new companion, Sir Jorn, a secret mutant knight errant. On their journey inland, they come upon a group of refugee duck-people, displaced from their city when an evil sorceress and her golem servants chose it as the staging ground for her dark technomagical spells. Now, the brave group of Archaeonauts will have to infiltrate the village, avoid the notice of the patrolling constructs, and defeat the wicked mage before her working is complete. Can they pull it off, or is this noble quest more than they can handle?

Apr 122017
 
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In this week’s episode of The Dreadful Secrets of Candlewick Manor, Noch hatches a scheme to clear Cecil’s name, but finds himself at loggerheads with Duncan, who believes that justice will be served. With the other orphans’ fate hanging in the balance, Karl, Dotty and Jareth will have to sneak past Althea, their new prefect pro-tem, and avoid Duncan, who knows what’s up and thinks it would be better if everyone stayed put. Can Karl keep on mission, or will he find himself distracted by midnight snacks? Will Dotty and her ghost friends be able to help, or will Erik get tired and leave the game early? Will this entire plan hinge solely on Jareth? (You know it will.) Can an orphan with a boneless arm and a demonic car save his friend from being disappeared by a corrupt town sheriff? Listen to find out!

Apr 052017
 
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In this week’s melancholic installment of The Dreadful Secrets of Candlewick Manor, Cecil, Noch and one of the Delaney triplets find themselves at the mercy of the sinister Sheriff Toulouse, falsely accused and imprisoned for the night. Meanwhile, the rest of the orphans find themselves in a similar predicament with Althea, the bullying temporary prefect that Dr. Candlewick has assigned to take Cecil’s place in the East Wing. Using the Delaneys to pass messages between groups, Noch attempts to orchestrate the group’s release, before Cecil is put away for a crime he did not commit. However, the situation is worse than they feared, which they learn when a local newspaperman, Icarus Lee, clues them into a shady backroom deal between the sheriff, the local judge, and Dr. Wilaby Sternacker, chief head-shrinker at the Zitomer Institute. It seems that they’ve been using “psychological evaluations” as a cover for disappearing the undesirables in town, carting them off to the booby hatch indefinitely. Can the gang break out of jail or clear Cecil’s name before it’s too late? Listen to find out!

Mar 292017
 
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It’s a simple job: go to the mall, break into the DMV and steal a bunch of shit for someone who needs it. The payout is pretty decent, too. Simple, right?

Well, nothing is simple in the Loss. It’s three legs from the enclave to the job site, and that’s plenty of time for shit to get cocked up and for someone to wind up dead. You’ll have to deal with greedy assholes who want to take what you’ve got and leave you for dead. And people who want in on your score, too. And the undead, of course.

And no one has been to this mall since the Crash. There’s probably a good reason for that. But as Takers, figuring shit like that out on the fly is all part of the job.

Join us as Rag-NERD-rok playtests the quick-start rules to “Red Markets,” and the players learn just how hard life can be west of the Recession.